January 2010
34 posts
I love my daughter more than life itself.
Which is why I would trade an hour off the end of my life if she went to bed an hour early. It is, quite frankly, in her best interests.
It's a limericky kind of a day....
Limericks can often be coarse,
So there are some rules to enforce.
Don’t rag on your spouse,
Or else, you big louse,
Your poem will end with “divorce”
I said I'd do a sonnet...
and, thus, here we are.
Warning: This took an hour, and I suspect it reads like it, so, you know, be nice to a hokey hack. Oh, and enjoy!
Holy Crap It’s a Poem!
When Spring will blink its rested eyes awake
To shave its wintery whiskers of snow,
Thawing to liquid the once frozen lake
While softening shores where the greens will grow,
We’ll stretch and yawn and throw our restless...
Non-alliterative Activity Friday: Limerick Edition
My lover, she gives me the shakes.
Her shadow is all that it takes
To start me to spasm -
I’m over Love’s chasm -
And I cannot put on the brakes.
For those of you baseball inclined
Or, who enjoy a good mangling of classic Dr. Seuss.
Background: I did this going into the 2006 season. I am a Cubs fan. Jim Hendry was and still is the general manager. That year, they traded a lot of youth for a older outfielder named Juan Pierre, whose only real skill was speed. They also had a lot of injury issues with their pitchers. I won’t go any deeper than that, but that’s...
Oh good, THIS is starting
I don’t like to fly. It didn’t used to bother me, but I’ve reached the point where every little bump makes my palms cry a river of panic. I don’t know if it’s being farther from my youth where invincibility seemed realistic, or that with every day lived I have more to lose, but whatever it is - those things, something else, a generalized terror cocktail - it’s...
3 tags
Wherein I give you more than you wanted...
Alright, this appears to be a thing tonight, so what the hell, I’ll join in. My 25 Things from last year. I have done you all the favor of putting this after the jump, because HOLY MONKEY LOVE THIS IS LOOOOOOOOONG. Seriously, you should make yourself a sandwich first. Or maybe wait until morning so you can have the whole day. You know, read 1-3, take a shower, eat some breakfast, read 4-8,...
OMG YOU GUYS!!!
You know that song about the couple who are terribly dysfunctional and bored with each other, so much so that they both take out personal ads - in a NEWSPAPER!!! HA! Olds are funny. - extolling their love of certain tropicalish beverages and rain and sex and terrible verse, and then they meet up, and it turns out IT WAS THEM THE WHOLE TIME, and contrary to all human instinct, they have a giggle...
So, the way I see it, these are my choices...
Choice #1: Wallow in my shame and sadness over all I’ve failed to do and failed to be.
This has been what I’ll call my “go to” choice over the course of my life. Near as I can tell, all it’s ever done is lead to more failing to do and more failing to be and more shame and sadness which leads to more failing to do and more failing to be and more shame and sadness...
1 tag
I actually wrote a little today...
…okay, that’s kind of a lie, because I didn’t do anything additive - it was more like editing and re-writing - but it’s a damn sight more than what I’ve done for a week or so, and based on the state of my creative mojo, what I did today was fucking Herculean.
HERCULEAN I SAY!!!
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go listen to Radiohead’s...
This may be one of those days
Despite the fact that I’d imagine 99.94%* of you read stuff entirely on your Dashboard, I occasionally feel that need to spend ridiculous amounts of time messing with the Theme on my actual page, even though I can honestly say that I’ve yet to find a Theme that I actually, you know….like.
So, there’s nothing odd or compulsive about that.
*An Ivory Soap reference makes...
OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY!
lafix:
angryoldcoot:
Will someone please tell me what this “ARB” thing means?!?? I know I’m supposed to know. I know this makes me old. I know this is probably an embarrassment akin to that time someone asked me if I’d ever had a Dirty Sanchez and I told them I didn’t even know anyone named Sanchez, let alone anyone I’d feel comfortable judging based on their personal hygiene, but JEEBUS...
OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY!
Will someone please tell me what this “ARB” thing means?!?? I know I’m supposed to know. I know this makes me old. I know this is probably an embarrassment akin to that time someone asked me if I’d ever had a Dirty Sanchez and I told them I didn’t even know anyone named Sanchez, let alone anyone I’d feel comfortable judging based on their personal hygiene, but...
4 tags
I just bought $5 worth of lottery tickets...
…which is all you need to know about my relationship with my job.
So, I had this blog once...
Thing is, I was terrible about writing for it. I’d had one baseball related blog for a number of years that I was all regular and good about, but when my job started to encroach on what I could do with it, I just let it die. Then after a while I wanted to write some more, so I started a new one where I’d write about earworms.
The problem is, I like to take a bit of time with stuff,...
And while we're on the subject of disturbed...
Here’s the bedtime exchange between me and the five year-old girl:
Me: “You make me happy all the time.”
Her: “You make ME happy all the time.”
(snuggle)
(pause)
Her: “You know, mummies aren’t real. They’re just dummies wrapped in toilet paper that get buried.”
Not that normal has ever been an especially viable...
But really, people, Twitter has ruined it for me. Case in point, I’m overhearing a fairly serious sounding commercial, and here’s the interaction between it and my brain:
TV: “Who cares for the land? Who grows more food now, compared to a few decades ago, using nearly half the energy and fewer resources for every bushel produced? Who?…”
Me: “Your Mom.”
this has sucked, but y'all make me feel better
ashamedtosay:
thanks, you guys for your well wishes, jokes, emails, likes/stars, @replies, rebloged notes and DMs, they have made a shit day a lot better.
The husband and I had to wait a long time to see if the meds would do what the Doctors wanted, and while we sat in the hospital room, we read your jokes to each other, and we showed each other the photos you posted, and it made everything a...
It appears I have done something silly
Like a bunch of you have.
http://angryoldcoot.tumblr.com/ask
Knock yourselves out, kids.
1 tag
Tuesdays Suck
have you seen up? thoughts?
Enjoyed it immensely. Pixar just makes remarkably well crafted films - visuals, characters, story, the whole thing - and this was no exception. No other filmmakers, animated or not, know how to make their audiences laugh, cry, and just generally feel the way these folks do. Up in particular is both hilarious and heartbreaking, and that makes it wonderful in my...